Of the Southern Wild

How to set oneself free from the 'idol of the days'...

The abrupt end of spring: the breeze dying down to a whisper, the last, dying cold flame of chill glancing off your face; the moon visible at 9 o'clock in the morning against a pure blue sky, its existence more fragile than porcelain, thinning out to the last line of moon-essence, as insubstantial as a dream, already sinking back into a  fathomless night...Calvino's moon, threadbare, elemental, "almost just a few atoms", a wisp of being, a  cloud, no more than a smudge of powder, its ancient affinity with transience shining through. Light filtering through the branches of an old tree, almost like a shower, adding depth and poignancy to the green shade.

A late birthday party. Time for linens and handkerchiefs to wipe clean sweaty brows. Ice tinkling in a glass, shades to hide our eyes, the sun's light deep in the leaf, slowing our sensibilities, crinkling our skin, growing in our cells. There is silver in our hair, gold-dust on our faces, pollen and dust rise from the earth and children laughing as the old ones sit on the benches under the trees, confused by it all, quieter if not yet speechless. The dark patches on people's skin has risen to the surface and makes their faces look kinder, gentler. The scene is timeless, re-enacted by every generation. How many days ago now was it that you were the one playing in the grass?

'Barney' sits on the curb, half out of costume, drinking a steaming cup of tea, exhausted by the whole show. He looks my way: "Give me ten minutes and I'll be Barney again".
I say to him: "It's okay, I understand."

We're all half-hearted in our roles nowadays...

Here it is again, the lull of the south, the slumber of eternal gestures. It is in no book. My heart, pulled elsewhere...points North, remembers winter grey. This isn't home, or even what the heart is given to make a home from (K. Irby). If we could walk one hour north-someone said-one hour north, so the sun was not in our faces. I fall, I fall in sunlight, under the sun. Christ.